The journey as defragging – the spirituality of travel

I have just had to defrag my computer, and think it is a pretty good description of what has happened for and to me during my travels – I have been defragged.

My understanding of what defragging is on a PC, (or rebuilding the desktop with an Apple Mac) is that under normal working conditions we create a lot of ‘mess’ on a computer – files are disordered, temporary files are created, we jump from one thing to another, leaving a messy trail behind.

I am staying at St Pete’s Beach in Florida with my sister Diana and her family – the last stage of my four month sojourn, heading home, and reflecting on the time away and what it has meant for me.

Defragging is like a spring clean of your system and its files – putting them back in order, getting rid of unnecessary clutter.

That is what this journey has done for me. After my partner Ngaire died, I felt that my life was barely under control – I did not have coherent sense of myself or my direction, I felt fragmented.

An extended time away has (I hope) enabled me to find myself again as a separate entity and focus on a sense of purpose and direction. I feel less anxious more open to the future and, yes, less fragmented.

I am sure travel is not the only way of achieving this – it is what we are offered in meditation and contemplation, or in simply taking time for ourselves.

Though I am sure re-entry into life in Waipu, my home village, will bring fresh challenges, I feel I am ready for them and have some inner resources to respond.

I talked about this when I had lunch yesterday with Susan Collins, someone who had wwoofed (what is wwoofing?) with me at my Waihoihoi Women’s lodge in New Zealand. I met her when she was also taking ‘time out’ to consider what next in her life.

Read some of Susan’s blogs here

Another reflection that emerged in our conversation was that often we need to get outside of our comfort zone – a different context, a different language, a physical challenge – before we are challenged to reflect or change. When we are out of our comfort zone the only place we can go is into our own space and reality and that is where we can grow.

So here’s to regular and intentional personal defragging!